A Lesson From My Son

As many of you know who follow my blog, my oldest son suffers from Fragile X Syndrome. This means there is a protein missing from his brain that’s necessary for effective learning . .  . and so, learning is difficult. Fragile X is called a spectrum disorder because patients who have it can fall on a spectrum of affectedness. Some Fragile Xer’s are very high functioning. In fact, some girls with Fragile X Syndrome are so high functioning no one would ever guess they have it.

My son’s functional level has been at the two-year-old level for quite some time. But like most things that sound just awful on the surface, there are blessings even with this. He’s over 18 and has never once talked back to me. 🙂 He smiles every day. He assumes everyone around him is happy to help him (including strangers, but that’s for another list).

As a mom who is getting older every day and feels it, I’ve been worrying more and more about the future. What will happen to my son when I’m no longer capable of caring for him? Even now, what happens to him when I’m not there, watching over him? What if he’s sick but doesn’t have the language to tell me something’s wrong? What if he wanders away from a group activity in school, or in special recreation, or lets himself out of the house in the middle of the night?

Oh, I have all kinds of worries!

As I mentioned, my son functions like a 2-year old, so his language is very limited. However, he often picks up phrases and repeats them at random. Providentially, during this summer where God has been drawing me closer to Him, one of the phrases my son has been using regularly is: “Don’t worry.”

Don’t you love God’s timing?

I’m never sure my son knows the meaning behind some of the words he repeats, but I can’t help but believe he knows the meaning behind these two words. Just this morning as I was getting him ready for the bus, I said it was chilly outside so he needed to wear a jacket even though I was letting him wear the shorts he prefers rather than long pants. Right on time, he said, “Don’t worry.” (But he did let me put his jacket on him anyway!)

Sometimes it’s easy to think God isn’t hearing our worries. I know God would rather we trusted Him than try carrying the burdens of life all by ourselves. The truth is He’s aware of all of our thoughts and emotions, and He’s still in control. Do bad things happen? Yes, of course. But nothing is a surprise to God.

So this week I’m striving to take a cue from my son. Don’t worry!